Sunday, August 21, 2011

19 Scissors and Counting

Today I counted how many scissors and nail clippers my mother has, so far I've found 19 pairs of scissors and 9 nail clippers. 
One common symptom dementia patients exhibit is thinking that someone is stealing from them; my mother hides things to prevent them from getting stolen.  Once she hides things, she forgets she's done it, then when she can't find something she thinks someone has stolen it all over again.  She then sees similar items at my sister's and brother's respective homes and she just packs the item into her purse or suitcase.  It's really a never ending cycle; hence the 19 pairs of scissors.
Now on the other hand, before dementia set in my mother did have some money go missing, so maybe part of this particular paranoia stems from what happened in the past, it's certainly something to think about. This is something that Lanny Butler discusses in his book about dementia, "My Past is Now My Future".

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Great-great grandma's wisdom

This is what my Mom said yesterday, the day she became a great-great grandmother for the first time. She said that young women get involved with men, start tickling them without knowing what they’re playing with, and end up with a baby. 
I know I’ve said this before but it continues to be true; there’s still always a bit of wisdom in my mother’s observations. 

Wednesday, August 17, 2011

I GET HER...that's a bit scary!

This time I understand her thinking more. 
The other day I took Mom to the bank.  In the past I would get some money out and hold my mother’s money for her, as she usually hides it, later saying someone has stolen it. This time I gave her the envelope with the cash, though all day she would open her purse, get the envelope out and count the money, she never lost it.  I think a combination of being at her own home, being on the correct medication and the person she usually accuses of stealing from her is on vacation, accounts for the improvements.. 
In general, this time, she is calmer.  I understand more of the way she thinks; many things she does actually relate to things from the past; there’s always a bit of truth to most of her ramblings.
Yesterday she said, “I am you and you are me”.

Wednesday, August 10, 2011

August In Florida....Are You Kidding???

I'M BACK
It’s August in Florida with hot steamy temps everyday, not the best time of the year to be here but I am.  I’m taking over for the month while my brother and his family take a week long cruise in the Caribbean.  Every care giver needs time off and I hope they are enjoying their vacation. 
After taking a red eye out from LA, I arrived bleary eyed to my brother’s house only to find that my Mom wasn’t there.   My brother had told Mom, the night before that I was arriving in the morning (that was a mistake).  Soon after he left for the airport, Mom got up told my sister-in-law she wanted to go to her house to clean up; my sister-in-law went back to sleep (another mistake), after telling Mom to go back to bed.  So Mom, got dressed, packed a small backpack, grabbed her purse and a big pink umbrella and off she went, out the front door, past 2 sleeping teenagers.  We found her over a mile away, just walking down the road.  She was easy to spot, with her big pink umbrella she was the only little old lady walking down the road in the hot morning sun.  That was my first panic and there are always more in store.  Reading this you must think…there are a few things that could have been done differently:
  1. Not tell her I was coming.
  2. Take her along to the airport.
  3. Once alerted that she wanted to go home, stay alert.
  4. Equip the door with an alarm.
  5. Have an ID bracelet on her
Those are all good and recommended ideas but it just doesn’t happen, people have limitations, some more than others, enough said.

At 94 my mother is still physically strong, determined and stubborn, combine that with a good dose of dementia and she can be exhausting.

Later in the day Mom was complaining that her leg was aching, I just smiled and thought I’m in for an interesting month.